Attracting Love Series: 7
May 22th 2016
In this series of 7 videos, we are looking at the habits of people that are able to attract high quality relationships. The seventh habit is knowing what to do "When your buttons get pushed".
The seventh and final habit of attractors that consistently attract high quality relationships into their lives is that they take responsibility for their buttons. You’ve all heard the expression they’ve pushed my buttons or my buttons were pushed when I was in that situation.
That idea of someone pushing your buttons, it seems easier just to get rid of the person so that your buttons don’t get pushed anymore, but what attractors do is that they take care of those buttons. They’re kind of grateful for the person to show them that I have this ugly, yucky button inside me that keeps getting pushed and makes me feel horrible about myself and about other people and sends me into anger or jealousy or whatever it is. And so they take care of those buttons. They go inside through whatever method works for them that they’ve found and they take of those buttons one by one.
Whenever they’re triggered off, they don’t look to the other person to change so that they feel differently next time. They understand that if they want to feel differently and respond differently in the world and not react, it’s within their power to change that. They don’t have to wait for someone else to change, which giving your power away to someone else - you’ve got to wait till they change in order for you to feel better. Attractors don’t do that. They’re like ah, there’s something in there that’s like a thorn inside me and anytime someone comes near it it feels painful.
Then they investigate it and they look deeper, and whatever modality helps them get rid of it or release it or love it away, they take responsibility to go out and do it. So it could be through hypnotherapy or regression therapy if it’s something deeply embedded in your subconscious, which it often is, because if it’s out of your awareness that the button was there in the first place, it’s in your subconscious and someone repeatedly coming and pushing those buttons is going to bring it up into your awareness. It could be Reiki. It could be any type of energy healing. It could be psychotherapy. It could be counselling. Whatever works for you, whatever it is that you found in your life that works for you. It could be naturopathy and bach or bush remedies.
There’s so many beautiful ways out there. We’re living in an age where you have an abundance of ways to sort out these buttons. And attractors through trial and error and trying this and trying that, they have found ways in which to heal themselves in the parts where they feel deeply wounded. And so they are unafraid to go into those places that hurt the most and to heal it up from those places.
Often when it’s out of our awareness we just want the outside world to shift and change and get rid of the stimulus that’s causing the pain, but what attractors do which makes them consistently attract high quality relationships is that they will sort out those buttons so that the triggers are not there anymore, the cause of the pain is not there anymore and so you can rub as much salt into it, there’s no wound there anymore to cause any pain or discomfort.
They take care of themselves that way so when any partner comes along and triggers them off, they have methods of sorting out that emotional pain, and that’s one way in which they consistently attract high quality relationships because they learn from each partner to the next and each partner helps them heal more deeply.
Sometimes particular thorns can only be touched in those intimate relationships. So you can be as single for as long as you want and I hear this all the time, I was so happy when I was single and then I got into a relationship and now I feel crap, and it’s because it takes sometimes an intimate relationship to gain access to those wounds and those thorns and those buttons that are already inside you that were kind of waiting to be pushed, to come up to your awareness so that you’re aware that they’re there and then to do something about it.
So the answer is never to get rid of the outside stimulus, it’s to go within and to heal up.
Often, what happens is if you’re healed and those wounds are gone, sometimes that partner was only brought into your life to make you aware of that particular wound and that they’ve served their purpose and their role in your life and then you’re vibrating the different frequencies and then the relationship ends but it’s not a failure. It’s never a failure. It’s always a step into deepening your love and your relationship with yourself.